There's Hope In The Wait

Don't Ever Give Up!

Never Give Up!

If every week of our life had a theme, this one’s theme would be “Don’t Ever Give Up” and it even has a video to go with it.  This young man summarized exactly what our game was like this week (even though he was talking about his own game)  with enthusiasm that is just contagious! 

Watch the video at this link if you haven't seen it yet. Apollos Hester's Inspiration Speech (sorry couldn't get the video to embed with this slow internet connection).

But even more, God has shown us this week that He never gave up on us!  The trials and the pain we've gone through were to bring us into this moment. 

Last Friday night I witnessed a team make just about every mistake you can make in a football game.  I witnessed a team that no one in town could remember the last time they had ever beaten the opponent but all were for sure we’d never beaten them on the road!  They had hand-picked us to be their homecoming game because they always have the upper hand.  In some people’s mind’s the game was already won by them before it was even played BUT . . . .

Despite the 5 Turnovers we had, despite the many penalty yards and big plays being called back for holding on us, despite a dirty game by the opponent that didn’t catch the eye of the refs, despite anything and everything going wrong, our team did not give up!  Any thoughts of quitting were replaced with ways of being unrelenting!  The team did not give up! 

With 6 minutes to go in the 4^th quarter and us being down 14 to 15, with drives having  been killed by turnovers  time and time again, our boys got the ball with 92 yards separating them from the end zone and the victory.  They drove down the field flawlessly, chipping down the yardage a little bit at a time until the 43 second mark when they pounded in a 1 yard TD run for what would be the winning TD! 

Many teams we’ve seen would not have that kind of success because they are thinking of quitting when our team thinks of being unrelenting!  Our team in all 3 games has been unable to quit.  They might start out slow but by the end they have put too much into it to give up then!  The scoreboard in all but one of those games proved their efforts but to everyone in the stands you could tell the team didn’t quit in any of the games.

In some games it seems we get to a slow start for three quarters.  We battle through mistakes and adversity for 3 quarters but then somewhere in the 4^th quarter, we get it going.  92 yards and no mistakes when it mattered the most!  That’s what not giving up can do!  Not getting down on your mistakes but willing to go out and work hard to get it back, that’s what life is all about. 

Last winter, there was reason for us to give up after 3 years of starting off slow.  Not only where people down on us, we were down on ourselves.  When we really didn’t have any drive to go another year, when we didn’t feel like our heart would be in to this anymore, and when it seemed easier to quit than to fight, we stuck our neck out one more time and although not every game is a win on the scoreboard, every game is a blessing to us like it never has been before.   Watching this team play, gives me hope each day.  Our future doesn’t have to look like our past.  God has not given up on us and we won’t give up on doing His Will.  Never Give Up!  

Win Or Lose, We Are Still Us!

The last 12 months as a coaching family has been challenging to say the least.  We have experienced turmoil from where we left and walked into a place that accepts us with arms wide open.  The offense one town hated, the other loves.  The characteristics one place hated about us, this place loves.  And I'm sure as we go along what the other place liked about us this place won't.  In the midst of walking through the comments from both sides, I decided that neither side was right about who we are.  Regardless of what both sides had to say, we are still who we have always been.  Maybe a little more tired and worn but roughly the same.  I started seeking my identity in who God says we are rather than the fans.  Last year, I began telling my husband "Win Or Lose, We Are Still Us" before each game and after each game but the truth was who we were was being influenced more and more by the scoreboard and then eventually by the school board. We began believing we were not good enough and didn't measure up but then we hit a turning point and we aren't looking back.  This poem flowed out of my heart this evening. 

Win or Lose, We Are Still Us!

by Kim Stone

It doesn’t matter what the scoreboard reads

Validation like that isn’t one of our needs

 

It doesn’t matter what the fans think

Love us or hate us, minds can change in a blink

Jobs may be lost or obtained by the wins and the losses

But who we are isn’t wrapped around in those tosses

We may be thrown around from one place to another

But who we are as people is what takes us even further

So sit in the stands and love the play calls

Or choose to blame us if the team falls

I can assure you who we are isn’t measured by a scoreboard

Who we are isn’t even decided by a superintendent or a school board

We coach and we serve for an audience of One and that is it

The One that knows us and shows us a love that will never quit

Our audience of One expects more from us than winning a game

He expects us to lead others to Him and proclaim His name

Sometimes it takes a loss for Him to get the teams attention

Sometimes it’s a win where credit to Him gets more than a mention

 

It isn’t up to us as the coaches to decide how God will use the game

It’s up to us to prepare the team in every way in His name

So love us or hate us, the choice is yours to make

We hope you choose to honor God for your own sake

But win or lose we are still us - remains for certain

Our anchor of hope that reaches beyond the curtain

(Hebrews 6:19)

For James said that one who doubts is like a wave tossed by the sea

Living by others opinions will drown you and not set you free

(James 1:6)

So we choose to live by His word rather than the words of our fans

Because we are living out our life according to His plans

“Win or Lose, We Are still us!” will remain our anchor until we are done

As we continue to coach and to serve for our audience of One!

I Am The Coach's Wife

*This was written right before a big game in 2013.  It was actually circulated around the internet as anonymous as I didn't want to claim my work due to the fact I didn't want to cause my husband any more problems than what he already had. Since I wrote this, my husband was let go from his position but has landed quite nicely on his feet at a smaller school and we can't be happier!  As we move on from all of this, it's been placed on my heart not to hide and to not live in a spirit of fear and it was wrong of me not to claim the work.  If God is going to give me a way with His words then I shouldn't be afraid to stand behind what He places in my heart.  

I Am The Coach's Wife

by Kim Stone

On Friday nights when the final horn sounds, you’ll find me in the arms of my hero

It never really matters if it’s a win or a loss where we get beat 100 to zero.     

You see I am the only one in the entire crowd

Who gets to be his wife and stand beside him so proud

I am the only one who truly knows him inside and out

I am the only one who knows what this man truly is all about

Yes he wants his team to win and the losses certainly do devastate

But more than anything he just wants to help set these young men’s lives straight

He puts in more hours than most could possibly believe

He wants the team to go beyond what they think they can achieve

It’s often an uphill battle for this man who carries this team on his back

The community and admin give him quite a bit of flack

But what they don’t see is the man who worries and prays for his team not to win but to know God

How he worries and prays for the lost who are so far from living right they won’t try out for the squad.

They don’t see the man who mentors those young men whose hearts are broken

They don’t see the man who is a light guiding players through God’s word that is spoken

They don’t see the pain he has when the team gives less than their best

They don’t see changing the lives  of these young men is his quest

They don’t see he wants more from his players than they are willing to give

He wants to truly show them 100% effort in all is how to live

But the roadblocks and the obstacles seem to come up each day

Where all he can really do to help this team is take it to God and pray

His obstacles daily are more than most would try to overcome

Plus he has all of the second guessing and undermining of some alum

It’s hard to read the comments on facebook and all the tweets

Saying how we need a new coach who knows how to compete

Most of these comments come from people who never met him face to face

Most  have never been to a practice or a game in the first place

It’s not easy to take the heat from those who truly don’t know this man

But it’s their loss for not knowing him and understanding his plan

You see, I am more blessed to walk beside this man than anyone in this town

I am blessed with a man who leads others daily to the victors crown.

It may not be a gold ball just yet but its bigger than that it’s eternal life

And  I get to be by his side and see it all because I am  the coach’s wife! 

New Beginnings

by Kim Stone

A new perspective is gained while waiting to see what life proposes

A new beginning is about to  start where a terrible ending closes

It’s been a difficult road with many turns and several twists

The pain and heart breaks are too numerous to even list

But a new day is about to dawn and break the darkness of our life

A new day that will take us far away from of all of this strife

A new chance to start fresh once again

To forget the pain from where we’ve been

However, I find myself completely unprepared for my new tomorrow

I still find myself at times in confusion and so much sorrow

Not because of the direction my life has now taken

But because of how I’ve changed; my identity is shaken

I feel blessed to be moving on to brand new things

But having lost some of my passion is what stings

We are moving on to a much better situation that  deserves our best

But knowing part of me died when we took too many shots to the chest

To many heartbreaks, to many broken promises, that killed part of our dream

Makes it impossible to have the same level of hope, passion or trust to gleam

So although the road ahead feels familiar and we’ve been there time and again

This time we are changed and life seems to be taking us for a spin

As we start anew, I don’t know how I’ll react to the same things

I’m different now so I’ll have to wait to see what this brings

But I do know this change is permanent as part of me died with the dream

That part of me is lost, forever gone, nothing to repair and nothing to redeem

It’s pointless to ask those who hurt us to understand what we’ve lost

It’s not just a job, income, or a house, it’s our dreams that have paid the cost

We truly had a love for this community and this town

One of the few trying to bring it up rather tear it down

But for whatever reason

We are moving on from this season

We are moving to a place that I wish we’d been all along

They are getting us at our weakest when they deserve us strong

And for whatever reason we will arrive a little broken

With humility in our hearts being what is spoken

God has had His hands in all of these messes

And what He has his hands in, I know He blesses

So as I sit waiting to see our new life begin

I have to thank Him for saving us once again

The pain of other circumstances not working out

Certainly did shed  a huge cloud of doubt

But seeing where we are and where we could be

I know God was right for reaching out to save me

My prayers for months were to deliver us from those who want to cause harm

So when he moved us why was I surprised and so alarmed?

He answered my prayer in a way I never would have believed

I can open my eyes to see now that my heart is no longer grieved

From looking out and seeking Him to searching within

I can now lift up my hands to signify I’m ready for the new life to begin

So here’s to our new tomorrow

And saying good-bye to yesterday’s sorrow

May God bless us in all we do each step of the way

And for our life to switch from night to the dawn of a new day

What Do You Want Out Of Life?

 God said to me, “I know you keep feeling that something is missing in your life. What do you want out of life?”

My first thought was happiness but being happy is too shallow.  My thoughts turned to joy but that is selfish too. If God is really asking me what I want out of life, those answers didn’t seem to cut it.  I thought of love but I have love so it’s not missing from my life.

God turned my attention over to the prayers I have been sending up lately.  Prayers to sell this house and to provide another place for us to live as we move and for us to be successful at our new jobs.  So he asked me, “Is it money and success you want out of life?”  And although that was what I had been praying for, I knew it wasn’t what was missing either.  He then brought my constant prayers to my attention, the ones for my family, friends and church.  Do you want the ones you love to always be safe?  And  this one sounded the most appealing.  I especially want my children to live a long safe life but I was left feeling that this isn’t quite it either.

I thought long and hard about this and since I already have a relationship with God, I knew it wasn’t God missing from my life.  What is it that I keep wanting, but don’t quite have that I can’t put my finger on?  What is it that I know I once had but now in its absence I can’t  figure out what it is? 

Then my answer came but It came as a question, I said “Faithfulness?”

It didn’t seem that could be it.  Faithfulness?  I have faith!  I know Jesus died on the cross for my sins and I know I am going to heaven.  I read my Bible and go to church and try to do the right thing.  Why would faithfulness be what I am lacking? 

Then the flashbacks came from this entire year.  The huge disappointments, the betrayals, the way life has taken us in a direction we never thought it would take.  The hurt and the pain that has drove us to want to take things into our own hands.  The gratefulness for their being a safe place to fall but the resentment of our other plans not working out.  All of these things pointed to not being faithful to God’s ultimate plan.  That the hurt and the pain had to happen to drag us to where God wanted us to be.  We wouldn’t have left on our own and so God had to hand deliver us.  The emphasis for us the past several months has been on what God has taken from us but God is showing us He has given us more than He took away. 

So now I know what I want out of life.  I want faithfulness.  I want to be faithful to God.  I want to do His will not my own.  I want to feel his faithfulness each day.  As a by-product of this faithfulness, I will find joy, there will be days of happiness, and by faith I know God will provide for our family what we need and that He will provide safety.  I know by faith He has every detail of our life already planned out.  I know all of this because I have lived all of this.  I have had faith through everything although it was just a mustard seed.  It took faith to keep moving through the pain.  I never lost my faith but faithfulness  is much deeper.  Faith is knowing what the Bible says and finding hope in a scripture. Faithfulness is believing it and living it out in our life. Faithfulness is full surrender to His word and to His will not just knowing His Word and praying for His will. Somewhere through the journey I held tight to my faith but lost my faithfulness.  I would have never figured this out on my own.  God saved me from myself once again!  

The Broken Glass

This weekend my kids were playing with a balloon at their Gigi's house.  I told them to stop and they both set down but my daughter continued to throw the balloon up within her grasp but behind her was a large glass vase that she inadvertenly tipped over when playing with the balloon and the vase shattered.   My reaction was that I had JUST told her not to play with the balloon, yet she still did so and she broke something that didn't belong to us.  So I did raise my voice and was not to happy with her.  

Then tonight we had just finished watching a movie together and I was doing laundry and checking email when I heard a crash.  I yelled, "What have you broken?" from the office and I was pretty upset to find a softball went through one of the glass panes in the door!  I was pretty upset and began the questioning and the "How could you throw a real softball in the house?" And somewhere in it all, I stopped. I looked at my kids and saw true repentance in their eyes along with great fear of what was to happen next.  God was showing me there was a better way to handle this and so instead of picking up the glass, I told the kids to have a seat on the couch.  I came back to the office to collect my thoughts before going to the bedroom to bring in my Bible.  I set between the kids and asked them if they knew how many times the Bible talked about Obedience. We then counted in the back of the Bible the scriptures listed that talked about obeying and there was 81 scriptures!  We decided obeying must be pretty important to be talked about that many times.  We read Ephesians   6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 "Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise-- 3 "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."  We talked about why this commandment came with a promise and why it's important to listen to your parents and when we were done the kids offered to pay for the window, told me they should go to bed for the night, and listed several punishments they believed fit the crime. I never once mentioned any consequences for their actions, they did.

I realized as I tucked them both into bed how much they matured and I realized there was a lasting change in them but more importantly a lasting change in me.  On Sunday, all I did was make my daughter feel bad for what she had done and by her actions today it was clear she learned nothing from it but tonight with a different attitude, I got much different results. Tonight she wasn't sorry for breaking the glass, she was sorry for a long line of defiance that led to breaking the glass.  There's a big difference between the two. And my son hadn't thrown the ball but he stood by his sister and owned up to his part in it and wanted to pay half for the window.  Neither one of them tried to blame the other.  They had each others back.

True repentance isn't just about being sorry for what you have done or caused, it's being sorry for everything that has led you down that path where the wrong choice was made.   My daughter may have shattered the glass in the door, but the disobedience she has been encased in also cracked.  We decided that studying all 81 scriptures of obedience is something we should begin doing each day to shatter the disobedient tendencies. It may be a small setback since the house is on the market to sell but it was a step-up in seeing how we all handled the situation.