Turning 40 and 40 Things I 've Learned

A few weeks ago, turning 40 seemed very depressing. What have I accomplished in 40 years? That question was depressing and life surely hasn't gone as I had thought or planned. God directed me to ask myself, "What have you learned in 40 years?" I began thinking about that and I challenged myself to come up with 40 things I have learned. The first 39 items, came to me so quickly that I could barely write fast enough to keep up with my own thoughts. God was bringing some important truths I have learned over the years and I fervently wrote them down in a short 30 minutes. When I looked to see how many I had, there was only 39. It seemed strange that 39 things flowed so quickly but #40, I was drawing a complete blank! Then God said "Your #40 is something you have yet to learn but something that will forever change your perspective. (I'll get more to #40 in a minute).

I felt these 40 things, should be private since they are the things I have learned but God has been pulling me to share what I have learned. In my busyness, I have not been obedient to it. And #24 clearly shows I know better than to delay what God asks me to do. But I also think it brings up an interesting point. Although I have learned these 40 things, it doesn't mean I am perfect in these 40 things. It means that I know them and although I strive to do them, I am not perfect and I fail over and over just like everyone else.

40 Things I Have Learned

1. I am usually unhappy in life when I try to fill up on things rather than fill up on God's word.

2. Marriage takes work and doesn't run on feelings but rather on a deep commitment.

3. Commitment fails when it's just a feeling. Commitment is determination + perseverance.

4. Happiness is short lived but real joy lasts despite the circumstances changing.

5. Chasing after things that don't matter is a wasted life. Make sure what you are striving for is worth it.

6. Parenting done right takes work. It doesn't mean hovering over your children but there's never a day off.

7. There's never time to do that thing or see that person you have been meaning to see so make the time.

8. If the devil can't make you do wrong, then he makes you busy. Guard against unnecessarily being burdened with things to do.

9. Life has very little to do with the job you do.  It has more to do with the work God asks you to do.

10. Never let a job take you away from doing the work God asks you to do.

11. Your marriage is important but your relationship with God is even more important. Keep Him first.

12. Your children are important but your marriage needs to come before the kids for things to work.

13. It is possible to love friends as family.

14. Taking time to rest is important.

15. Most problems are created by ourselves or others because they serve as distractions keeping us from seeing what we really need to see.

16. Life is very seldom about what we see it's about going deeper.

17. When you realize the road to heaven is narrow, you realize how many aren't heading towards the path that will take them there.

18. The closer you get to God the more your viewpoint changes.

19. We make loving one another more complicated than it needs to be.

20. Forgiveness sets you free even when the other person shows no signs of wanting to be forgiven- forgive them anyways.

21 If you look for good you will find it.  If you look for bad you will find it.  Look for what is best for you to find.

22. God will fight your battles for you if you let him.

23. You don't have to have all the answers, you just have to have all the prayers.

24. Delayed obedience is not obedience at all.

25. Time heals wounds only when you pray over those wounds.

26. Don't confuse the right thing to do and the easy thing to do. Doing the right thing  ALMOST ALWAYS is NEVER the easy thing to do.

27. Doing the right thing even when you don't want to is the definition of obedience.

28. Relationships are all that matter.

29. Be committed before you marry and take divorce off the table as an option.

30. Relationships can thrive after going through difficult times.

31 Don't rob yourself of an amazing outcome because you quit when things got hard. It's a process. Stay with it.

32. Trust God not people.  People will let you down. God will not let you down even when you feel like he is. His ways are better than ours. 

33. You'll never understand God's love for you until you become a parent.

34. You'll never understand your parent's love for you until you become a parent.

35. Life is comprised of the small things that when brought together let you see the true picture.

36. Success does not equal fame or money.  Success lies in your obedience to God.

37. I've never felt like who I am has aged, just feel like time brought about more understanding.

38. People only remember how you made them feel.

39. Life lessons often repeat until you learn from them.

40. What you do for others is never taken for granted by God.

And there it is #40.  "What you do for others is never taken for granted by God!".  In this season of life, it's easy to feel taken for granted.  But God, He sees it and He isn't taking this for granted.  He knows what I am doing.  He appreciates the obedience! He could do without the "pouting" part though and I think that's why he brought this to my attention! 

With a fresh perspective having wrote this weeks ago, the over-arching theme in these 40 things is "Priorities", "Obedience" and "Relationships".  You need to establish things in the right order with God first, then your marriage, then your kids.  You need to be obedient to His word and what He asks you to do.  And life is all about "relationships".  Your relationship with God first, then your relationship with your spouse, then your children, then the relationships outside of that. It's amazing to think of the huge chunk of time, I have devoted to work either as being a manager or being a teacher and stepping back and realizing that the life God wants us to have has little to do with our 40+ hour a week job but has to do more with the relationships we build and the obedience to Him while we are there!   

I hope this list helps someone in someway.  Sometimes I am very excited to share what God has shown me and other times I'd rather keep it to myself.  This is one I'd rather keep to myself but God has urged me to share. Thanks for taking the time to read it.